The perfect gift, sorta
by PrimeEmily135
Summary: Shockwave and Scourge spend some quality bonding time together. Book four in the "Left for Dead" series. Very fluffy One-shot!


**So here it is! The perfect gift!..sorta ;) enjoy!**

** (Breem: 8.3 minutes)**

* * *

"Shockwave, what were your sparkling stellar-cycles like?"

Scourge had settled comfortably on his lap, curled up into his chest as he read over his work in the privacy of his quarters. The "love seat", as she had called it, was a new addition to his living space, but it was a nice change. Scourge sometimes spent hours with him, quietly cuddled into him as he worked. The silence was comfortable, and she was happy too. It was a wonderful compromise to the issues they had been having trying to balance his work and their relationship. And for once, the jest of the idea had been _his_. He always had trouble satisfying her need of closeness, but one day as they had been "discussing" (more like Scourge was begging on her servos and knees for him to show her an ounce of affection now and then) the issue he had come up with the idea of sharing his berth with her. The way he had said it did entitle a little shock and mockery on her part, but he quickly explained what he had really meant by it. He normally sat on his berth as he looked over his files, simply because the office he had was not large enough for him. He proposed that Scourge could cuddle beside him as he worked. Even she had liked the idea, to which he was secretly proud of.

They tried that out for a week, but after that Scourge was again disappointed. During the time when she could be near him without disruption, she kept falling asleep! He had noted this at the very beginning and wasn't bothered by it, but she was. And that would have to change. So, after trying many different sitting situations (all ending with her eventually falling asleep half way across the berth) she finally had the idea to actually have a chair made for them. He had been skeptical of the idea at first, remembering how horribly uncomfortable and therefore distracting his office chair had been, and was unconvinced that she would be able to stand it let alone him. But she had surprised him. The large "couch" she had asked to be made was a perfect fit for him, and when he worked he was able to focus. And because of the upright position, Scourge was able to stay close to him without falling into recharge. She was happy for the time they were able to spend together in closeness, and he was pleased to have appeased her while still being able to complete his tasks.

And now, spending their time like this had become a nightly occurrence. Scourge would come to him with a cube of energon for him and one for herself, and she would sit in his lap until he was finished with the reports and research he was in charge of. Of course, being who she was, she wasn't silent all the time. She occasionally pulled conversation out of him, but only when it seemed that he had little work to accomplish that night, as he did this night.

He paused in his reading to look down at her. Her blue optics were dimmed as she dozed, but her curiosity had been piqued. She was watching him expectantly through her half-lidded gaze. Her spark hummed pleasantly in her chest, vibrating against his so alluringly that his thrummed in response. Although he wouldn't admit it directly, he probably enjoyed the close contact as much as she did.

She waited patiently, a rare occurrence, for him to answer her question. He had not thought about his stellar-cycles as a sparkling in a long time. For the most part they had been filled with torment and confusion. Only now that he looked back at it could he understand why he had been treated so poorly by others of his age. He was weird, an outcast, and the nerd. No one could understand him. Femmes avoided him. Mechs taunted and hurt him. And his Sire and Carrier had done nothing about it. So, he had eventually stopped trying to associate himself with them. It was illogical for him to have any part of their lives if they rejected him at every turn. He turned to his studies and secluded himself. As he grew up he became a ground breaking scientist, but that was all that mattered to him. He had long since stopped caring about the company of others and was lost to their world. And that was the state that Scourge had found him in. Damaged. And as far as anyone else was concerned there was no repairing him. But she had seen through that assumption, and she had even found a way to love him.

"My time as a sparkling.. is not a pleasant tale." He finally said aloud, looking down at the floor, away from her optics. He knew that she would be disappointed with his answer, but he just couldn't divulge his past to her. There was a reason he had ignored it for so long.

It was painful.

Although his emotions had been put into dormancy at the time it was still painful. He hadn't been able to understand their accusations and their taunting because their statements were illogical and confusing. And because he couldn't understand it he was hurt even more. On the way home from his education center he was often jumped by the older mechs of his school. As he got older his frame grew to a more intimidating size and the beatings stopped, but the verbal torment was still there. Many had accused him of being a closet case homosexual because he had never been with a femme. He almost smirked at the thought. _They wouldn't think that now…_

"My past isn't pleasant either, but I've told you a lot about it." Scourge pointed out, yawning tiredly.

"Yes, but you talk too much." He battered, a small smile coming to his lips when she smacked his chest with a laugh.

"You don't talk enough! I have to force every single scrap of information from you." She sat up straighter, resting her back against the arm of the couch with her legs draping over his lap. "You don't ever just talk. We've known each other for stellar-cycles and I hardly know anything about you!" She crossed her arms in the fashion that he had come to call adorable with her. It wasn't her stern look. It was better read as a look of pleading and disappointment. "Please?" she tried again. "I promise I won't tell a soul…"

He vented, taking a long sip of the energon she had brought him. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to share his past with her… _After all, she too had a hard time growing up._ He reconsidered it briefly before finally nodding. "Alright, one story. Pick your subject wisely femme…" he gave her an analyzing look, waiting for her answer. As she was so kind to be patient he would be too. He didn't have to wait long however.

"Tell me the first memory that comes to your mind."

"Do you have a specific time frame preference?" he stalled, really not wanting to reveal the first thought that came to mind.

Scourge thought a little bit, and then decided quickly. "A story from your thirteenth stellar-cycle."

_Frag_. That had been the year that his first thought had been. "Very well then…

"It was the colder cycles of Cybertron's orbit." He started and she curled back into a ball, comfortable at his side. He cautiously wrapped an arm around her before continuing. And as he revealed his tale to her the memories came back in full…

_It was cold. And being of a smaller build at the time, he had shivered fitfully as he sat alone far away from the other sparklings at recess from their schoolings. He curled up, his knees to his chest in an attempt to retain his warmth as he read over his newly acquired datapad. He had worked all the time he had off from school to earn the credits to buy it. Science was by far his favored subject, but his school did not have a very well thought out teaching of it so he resorted to teaching himself. It was the logical choice._

_Despite the harsh conditions he poured over the information of the datapad with enthusiasm, ignoring the sights and sounds of the other sparklings at play in the middle of the schoolyard. Play was not his form of recreation. He found rest in studying. And it also allowed him to further his knowledge to give him a proper future._ So where is the logic of trying to fit in with the others?

_He had been telling himself that ever since the operation to put his emotions into dormancy. It hadn't been very long ago, but he could hardly remember what it was like to be normal. He didn't want to go back, so he didn't think on it for long. He would be better equipped for the Science field without the hindrance of emotional instability. _

_He considered this once again as he read, focusing more on the datapad though. But he was so consumed in his thoughts that he did not hear the approaching footsteps of the older mechs. Taken off guard, he was stunned the first sparkling snatched the datapad out of his servos. _

_"What's this? Some kind of playmech data?" he smirked, tossing the datapad over his shoulder to one of his colleagues. "Oh wait, I forgot. You're not into _femmes_ are you?" he snickered and the other mechs joined in with boisterous laughter. _

_Shockwave watched them impassively, standing up slowly. "You have no proof to your theories and therefore your accusations are invalid." He said inexpressively, reaching forward toward the mech in possession of his belonging. "I would like that back." _

_The thin winged Seeker looked at the datapad idly before glancing up at the leader of their group. Said leader merely smirked. "Why should we give it back? What'll you do if we don't?" _

_"It is not yours. And if you do not give it back freely I will take it back by whatever means necessary." It confused him that they did not take him seriously. They should have known by now that they could not force anything but a logical response from him. Why did they continue to try to provoke emotion from him by way of tormenting him? _

_"Oh, well then if you're gonna take it either way I guess we should give it back shouldn't we?" the grey mech nodded to his friend and the Seeker promptly threw the datapad on the ground at Shockwave's feet. _

_And it shattered._

_"Whoops." All the older mechs laughed as he stared at the mess of broken parts. The screen flickered once before the device off-lined, broken beyond repair. "You should really think of investing in less breakable objects." he scoffed, bringing Shockwave's gaze up to him._

_He simply stared at him in disbelief. "What have I done to you to bring your malicious intent upon me? Why do you continually insist on sentencing me to constant abuse? Why do you do this?" something was clicking together in his processor, a feeling of unjust treatment. What right did they have to do what they did? Where was the logic in their actions? _

_The large grey mech's expression soured and the next moment Shockwave found himself on his back on the ground, a hand over his faceplates. "It's fun. Do I need any other reason?" he and his friends laughed and retreated as the bell rang, signifying it was time to go back inside. _

_Shockwave picked himself up off the ground slowly, wincing slightly when he turned his helm to watch the other sparklings file into the building. He could already feel the bruise forming from the blow to his face. Physically it hurt, but he knew that the pain would go away soon. The damage would be repaired with time… the same could not be said for his datapad. _

_Picking up the pieces of the broken device he tossed it unceremoniously into a recycling bin. There was no point in letting it be a complete waste… but the fact that it was broken made him-_

"-upset." Shockwave concluded with a slight nod. "I was indeed very upset." His optic darkened for a brief moment in recollection of how he had been treated as a young mech. He just couldn't believe how things had turned out in his favor after so many stellar-cycles of mental abuse.

"Oh my goodness!" Scourge growled, her optics turning a little red around the edges in defensive anger. He smiled minutely, secretly liking how she became defensive and protective of whatever and whoever she loved. It was very endearing. "Who were those creeps? If I ever see them I'm going to tear them to shreds!" she exclaimed, looking very serious.

Shockwave shook his helm at her, slipping his arms around her waist to restrain her from getting up. "Well, you see, that is no longer necessary." He explained, trailing off at her disappointed look. _This femme is far too violent for her own good._ He noted for the umpteenth time.

"Aw, are they dead?" even her voice was dissatisfied.

He shook his helm again. "No, since our sparkling years we have reconciled and worked through our differences. I am currently my adversary's first lieutenant-"

Her optics grew wide. "It was _Megatron_?!" her mouth fell agape and he sighed as she struggled in his grasp. He had anticipated this response and had tightened his hold on her.

"Yes, it was Megatron. And his friends were Starscream and his trine brothers. As you can see, the Seeker and I have never been on friendly terms with one another…" He waited for her to calm as she processed the new information, and then loosened his grip on her to a more comfortable embrace.

"I just… I can't believe that someone would do that to you…" her frown upturned in a sort of mischievous smirk that he had long learned to dislike. "So people thought you were into mechs?"

He sighed in frustration at her. "Out of my whole tale, that is what you want to focus on? I am not into mechs, I just never cared for relationships until-" he was quickly cut off when her lips pressed against his softly. He quieted obediently to her silent demand and drew her closer to his chassis. His spark hummed happily as she sucked and nipped playfully at his lower lip. He was still relatively new to the whole idea of kissing in a close setting such as this one, but he had come to conclude that she felt more at ease to be passionate when they were alone together.

And he was completely fine with that.

Scourge pulled away slowly, her fingers brushing over his audio receptors. The touch tickled, and he shivered at the electric tingles that ran down his spine. "I know you're not into mechs." She whispered, her helm pressed against his affectionately. "If you were you wouldn't put up with me."

"No, I would have still dealt with you accordingly." He objected, insulted that she would think so little of him.

As if sensing his distress, she laughed. "It's a joke Shockwave…" she rolled her optics at him. "Just a joke…"

He shook his helm at her, letting the insult slide. "Well, in any case, my cycles as a youngling were not pleasant. That is only one of the many instances where I was singled out and tormented by those older and younger than myself. Teachers loathed me because I was more intelligent than most of them, especially my science teacher." He nearly smiled at the memory of the mech throwing his vials and chemistry books and screaming for him to leave his classroom and never come back. "I read many datapads on the subject of science. It was all I ever strove towards…" His voice fell quieter. "But I never did get to finish reading that one they broke." He broke out of his memories quickly, hoping to avoid anymore thoughts of his past. "It does not matter. The present is the only thing that matters as of now."

Scourge smiled and leaned up to kiss his cheek before hopping off of his lap. "Well, I have to go now. I got all that I needed…" she trailed off, giving him a mischievous, flaunting look as she trailed out of his quarters.

_Oh no, that can't be good. _

What mayhem had he given fuel to this time?

* * *

Scourge strode out into the hallway with purposeful steps. Her spark hummed happily as she dodged by some lone Vehicons, going over her thoughts quietly. For the past few weeks Shockwave had been putting in lot of effort to make her happy, and she felt slightly guilty for not being able to do anything for him in return. He was just so hard to crack! If she was completely honest she hadn't expected him to actually tell her anything about his past, let alone actually give her an idea of what she could do for him. With the idea figured out and planned she had time to think over this story more. The fact that Megatron had once tormented him was surprising. With how loyal he was to the warlord she never would have guessed their past connection.

And it also seemed that Shockwave and Starscream had long since been rivals. She was sure that if she had heard more of their interactions as children she would figure out exactly why the Seeker hated him so much. But she had an idea it had something to do with jealousy. Starscream was a science officer after all. Perhaps Shockwave's success was intimidating to him?

She smirked at the idea. In all ways her mech was better than the flimsy, thin Seeker. Always had been, and always would be…

_He may be a pain in the aft at times, and frustrating, and clueless… but he tries so hard… Every mech could use to take a lesson from him._ She entered the passcode to her quarters, which had been installed with more security measures due to Shockwave's persistence, and she quickly slipped inside to start her project.

* * *

Late the next solar cycle, Shockwave retired to his berth chambers in exhaustion. Processing the raw cybermatter to extract the problems within it was proving more difficult than he had thought it would. And Megatron wanted results, soon.

He sighed heavily, warding away the feelings of recharge as best he could as he punched in the code to unlock his quarters. As he entered the doors shut and locked behind him. The only ones that had access to his private quarters were Megatron, Knock Out, and Scourge so he didn't worry about interruptions for the next while. If Scourge was punctual, and lately that had been the case, she would arrive in five breems. That gave him just enough time to find the datapads he needed for his project and off-line his optics for three breems before she arrived.

Setting aside his datapads on the large chair pushed up against the wall, he retired to his berth. Lying down, a quiet burst of pent up breath left his circulation system. He was just so _tired_. He hadn't felt this exhausted since he had to wrestle Predaking down for his vaccinations. The puzzling thing was that he had done nothing strenuous that entire day.

_ Perhaps I am merely declining in my physical state due to aging…_ For some reason that idea bothered him. _I am not to that point of time yet… am I? Was he old? No, Megatron is a few stellar-cycles older than I and he is still considered young. Perhaps I have just been doing something straining and didn't realize it_. He tried not to think too long on it. More than likely it was his psyche pulling a ruse over him. He had not slept well the night before. After Scourge left him alone he was abandoned to his thoughts. He had not imagined that he could ever get so lost in his past that he would not be able to recharge. It was exhausting.

He spent the many hours of the night thinking about his past conflicts. With Starscream. Megatron. Even his parents. And it had occurred to him that no one had truly had any emotional attachment to him. Perhaps that was one contribution to his volunteering for the procedure to eradicate his emotional abilities? He would not have been surprised. The way Scourge made it sound, being unloved and unwanted was worse than death itself.

It also occurred to him that Scourge had been the first person ever to treat him with kindness and caring. She had put up with him for months as he tried to sort through his awakened senses, and she was still helping him through it. Seriously, the femme was amazing. When she was frustrated with him she left so as not to yell at him or hurt him. It had taken him a while to realize this, but when he did it made sense. Although, despite that, he didn't like to let her leave without patching up their relationship. A hug was the best way. She sometimes pushed and tried to get away, but he was undoubtedly stronger than her and he kept her close until she calmed enough not to leave the room in tears. He didn't like to see her cry.

The fact that he was so attached to her was spreading through rumors around the crew of the Nemesis. Megatron himself had asked him if the rumors were true, and Shockwave deduced it logical to tell the truth. His leader's reaction was strange and unexpected, as he had actually encouraged him to keep her close and not let her go. But although he approved, Shockwave asked him to keep the subject quiet. He didn't think that Scourge would like to have their trying and exhausting relationship to be broadcasted all over the warship. Megatron had agreed to put the rumors to an end and that had ended the conversation.

Shockwave sighed, trying to slip into recharge and forget everything for just a moment. He wanted to rest. The stress that had come with reliving moments from his past was driving his processor to its limits.

But rest was out of his reach it seemed. Not a breem later, he heard the door open and Scourge skipped inside with an excited grin on her face. She looked around the room and, when she spotted him, practically ran to his side. "To his side" was a relatively loose term, as she had climbed up onto his berth and jumped on top of him!

He grunted at the force of her landing on his abdomen, but his slight discomfort went ignored as she straddled him, holding something in her servos behind her back. Her entire frame posture pointed to the fact that she was not going to calm until he found out why she was so happy, so he saved himself the trouble of asking her to let him up. If she was excited she would scoff and keep him pinned down.

"Hey…" she drew the word out with a smile, leaning over him to brush her lips over his mask. "You want to open up for me?"

His optic dimmed in exasperation at her, (he was seriously tired!) but he did as she requested and she kissed his scarred lips for only a few seconds before pulling away again. Her hips wiggled a little as she adjusted on top of him to relieve his frame of the full brunt of her weight and he watched her silently, waiting for her to get to her point of being early.

"So." She started, still not allowing him to see what she was hiding. Her smile was almost uncontrollable and she was squirming in her armor. _She must be truly eager about something_. He thought briefly before hearing her speak again. "I know that you have been working really hard to make me happy lately and, well, I want you to know that I really appreciate it."

"You show me verbal appreciation often Scourge. This is nothing new." He said simply, watching her sigh and shake her helm at him. Her expression was like that of a mother humoring her sparkling. For some reason it seemed to fit her well. _I wonder if she has ever considered have sparklings of her own… _If history served him well, she had proved time and time again that she _could_ be patient..when she wanted to be. She was kind. She loved to laugh and smile. She was very protective. But she was also with mental issues. He still caught her now and then in a depressed slump. He couldn't be sure that she wouldn't try to-well, harm herself again. She hadn't in a while, but who could say she wouldn't again?

"Well.." she huffed, settling down a little more firmly on top of him. "I don't feel like I do enough. So… I got you something."

"That is not necessary Scourge." He assured, his servos creeping up to rest on her knees. In the privacy of his quarters he had become a little more comfortable touching her without actual reason to. And she always seemed to enjoy it. Her cheeks would heat up and turn a shade of pink when he did, and she smiled shyly. It was beautiful.

"Yeah, but I wanted to. Just to show you that I do listen to you and I want to make you as happy as you make me…"

"I highly doubt that will ever be possible." He said seriously. Although he had developed the sensations of some emotions he had come to the conclusion that he would never be like a normal mech. It was a miracle that he had come as far as he did. His words however didn't affect the femme in the slightest. She just smiled and held out a small package to him.

He gave it a sideways glance, inspecting it thoroughly before taking it. Scourge smiled, but she also seemed nervous. "I hope I got the right one…" her voice was barely a whisper but he heard it, heard the anxiousness in her, and decided to find out what it was quickly to end her mental struggle.

It was a datapad.

On the front was a label.

"The complete works of Ine-Stine…" He breathed the title quietly in disbelief. "How..why…" he stared up at her, and her smile widened. Her delight in his surprise was undeniable.

"You said you never finished reading it, so I thought 'There's no better time than the present'." She shifted as he sat up, sliding down onto his lap as he inspected the datapad. After a few minutes he could practically feel the nervous waves coming from her and he finally spoke up again, voicing his thoughts.

"Scourge, I appreciate the thought and care behind this notion but… I have already disproven everything this mech ever wrote."

Her expression instantly fell, her smile disappearing. "What?" her optics practically radiated disappointment. She groaned, covering her face before flopping over onto the berth beside him. "Ah fot ah foft uff fumfing wate…" her muffled words of distress coupled with her disheveled sigh proved to confirm that he had upset her. And, to his surprise and hers, he chuckled.

"Scourge…" he placed the datapad aside on the small stand next to his berth and moved to scoop her up into his arms. Doing a quick once over he found that she was upset, but not crying. _That is a relief and blessing. _He thought, holding her gently by her shoulders as he restrained her to his lap. He brushed circles over her armor seams softly, watching her expression change to a flat questioning stare. "You are so thoughtful and caring Beautiful. Kind. I do not deserve you." She blushed and looked down, but he tilted her chin back up with his finger. "Do not try to make me feel worthy of you, for that will never be possible."

"But you are!" she objected. "I feel like I'm not good enough for you most of the time… You do so much for me all the time, and I just wanted to do something for you for once-"

He stopped her there, his finger brushing over her soft lips before pressing his own lips there instead. Her surprise rippled through her body all the way down to her feet, which wrapped tightly around his legs when he pulled away. "You do more for me than you could ever realize. Every moment you expend in my company is a gift. The nights you come here to sit with me are all treasured in my spark. You are the only one ever to treat me like a normal Cybertronian. You are the only one in my life that I can honestly admit to tolerating at any moment of the cycle. When you are near I feel a weight lifted from my spark. You are…" he paused, not believing he was about to say something so illogical and romantically tastelessly overused. "You are the light of my spark." His words had the desired affect however as Scourge stilled in shock. Coolant gathered in her optics but her smile contradicted it, confirming her reaction to his statement as a happy one. That pleased him. For once he was able to come across as he intended and received the reaction he was striving for.

Scourge wiped the coolant away from her optics, throwing her arms around him. "Shockwave, I love you…" the corner of his lip upturned at her confession. Every time she said those words his spark did a beat too many, but he didn't mind. It was exhilarating.

After a moment in silent embrace, he felt her stir and settle down on the berth at his side. Her small form still leaned against the front of his chassis, but she had moved into a position more suitable for recharge. Suddenly, an idea came to him. As illogical as it was, he spoke it out loud anyways. "Would you like me to read to you?" he asked, picking up the previously set aside datapad.

"Yes!" she said a little quickly and too enthusiastically.

"You will have to keep in mind that everything I speak from it is false and not reliable-"

"Shockwave…" she laughed quietly. "I'm not a scientist. I don't think it will matter all that much." She pointed out, slipping into the space between his arm and body. Her cold frame pressed tightly against his warmer one and he held her securely against him.

He made a small noise of amusement. "I suppose it will not matter highly…" he agreed, turning on the datapad. He read aloud to her, his voice deep and steady. The already familiar words rolled off his glossa without fault, and although the words were not true, Scourge seemed to be vaguely interested in what he was saying. Her attention wavered however once he reached the second chapter. There he noticed her starting to drift off into recharge, but he kept reading. Only when he heard her soft breathing slow did he finally go quiet.

He glanced down at her where she cuddled close to him, his spark thumping in fondness at the sight. He didn't disturb her, instead he remained still, all previous tiredness he had felt before her arrival had all but disappeared. So, he remained quiet for her sake and scrolled down the chapters in the datapad to the very last one. He remembered that it was the very one he had been reading before it had been forcefully taken from him as a sparkling. He continued reading quietly from that point, and within the earth hour he finished it, turning the device off and setting it aside.

He smiled slightly. Who would have thought he would have the chance to finish reading that document after all the stellar-cycles gone by?

Glancing down at the femme on his arm, he pulled her closer to him and signaled the lights in his berthroom to turn off. Scourge automatically buried her face into the front of his chest as he lay down beside her. The fact that she trusted him so completely gave him pride and hope for their relationship. They both made mistakes from time to time, but the devotion that they both had for each other kept them together. They both strove diligently to please the other, to comfort and understand. He was a little slow at times, but she forgave him. She was frustrating and confusing, but he had learned to work through her spells. And they were both still learning.

"How was I fortunate enough to be found by you?" he stroked her cheek softly as she slept. "I could have died alone on Cybertron, but Primus saw fit to bring you to me… You saved me. Changed me into a better mech…" He went silent, thinking over everything she had ever done for him. She thought that she had to give him things to show him that she cared, but in reality, she _was_ the perfect gift. And nothing would ever make him forsake her.

Leaning over her, he pressed his lips to her helm. "I care deeply for you Scourge. Nothing will ever convince me to change that." With that said, he too fell into recharge…

* * *

**Leave a Review please :) and be on the lookout for my next book "The Empress"**


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